promises

{09.21.2017}

My heart hurts... you promised me things wouldn't change, that we'd be the ones to work out our problems. That we wouldn't just end it when times got rough. You changed your mind in a matter of minutes and left me crying myself to sleep. I just need to know if you were crying too... and if you're getting over it. If you're already over it, or if you're not. If you're sitting in class choking back tears, or if you're completely okay.

I guess I can't say I was hurt by the end itself, we both saw it coming. I think that it was more of the sting from how fast it happened, how sudden it felt. But at the same time I thought, I thought we would last. You promised me that. Told me you wanted me, and only me.

I should have realized that sooner or later, everything good comes to an end. Life, trust, love, this. Us.

Us. I don't really know what to call this, because it's been a roller coaster for the last month.

I think, eventually, we both saw it coming, but I wasn't quite ready for that.

I only wanted you. It's been less than twelve hours, and it feels like too long to be without my other half, my best friend. My heart. I want you back. The feeling of your hands on my waist, or the skin of my lower back. The subtle way you made me care more than I realized. How I knew from the moment I met you that I wanted you.

But you had to go and screw me over, cuss me out and tell me to grow up. Everything just went too far, too fast for me.